Asking for what I want is a powerful technique for receiving it. This seems so obvious, and yet has not been that easy to believe. Somehow, it seems safer to hide my desires, to protect myself from the disappointment of not getting them. While this does protect me, it simultaneously limits my ability to actually realize my dreams. This year I have been asking for healing, asking for support, asking for community. And I have received all three in ways so much greater, so much more potent, and so much faster than I ever imagined possible. I tend to think of synchronicity as an affirmation that I am on the right path, that I am exactly where I need to be. And right now, it feels so powerful. With only five days until my 30th birthday, I feel so opened up to the possibilities that await me in my next decade of life. Thanks to all of you for the support, love, encouragement, wisdom, vulnerability and openness that you have offered to me during the past 85 days. It has had an incredible impact on my rewiring process, and on my life as a whole.
I continue to work on increasing my capacity to express my desires and to receive them. And I still orient toward Synchronicity as a sign that I am in the energetic flow of my life. I am generally a high-flow, high-synchronicity person. I think the thing that has changed for me most in this regard is that I now understand that just because I'm in flow and there's synchronicity, doesn't mean it will necessarily feel easeful. The hard parts are still hard, and sometimes they need to be that way, and there's no level of alignment that will bypass the shadow work and scary places. These days when I'm in those narrow places I know there's nothing wrong, even if I wish I wasn't there.
ReplyDeleteExpressing my desires and being open to receiving them continues to be an area of growth for me. I am very clear on how powerful it is to do so, and that I am reaching for that capacity. And, there are decades of deep conditioning that I have to navigate as I lean in to my desires. Some of the layers of conditioning: sex-negativity, body-negativity, work ethic, productivity, and asceticism, all disdain desire as frivolous, selfish, and immoral. My sexual freedom has come from healing these wounds. And, there is still so much more to heal. May this decade bring even more healing to open my channel for Pleasure and Play wider and wider!